I just heard the kid that got an iPad for Christmas ask my son what a yo-yo was.
He's five.
Now, if you think this is going to be a rant on appropriate gifts for youth or how we are excelling the degradation of the next generation with mind-numbing electronics, it's not. Sorry. Guess you can't please everyone.
If I've learned anything in 2015, it's the power of tolerance and keeping an open mind. What pain or turmoil does it cause me that some five year old got an iPad? How in any way does that impact my life? It doesn't.
Instead, I'm going to focus on the fact that he didn't know what a yo-yo was. No, it's still not going to be a rant. Looks like I'm zero for two today. Instead, this will be an observation. A detailed observation filled with acceptance and different points of view and all around good feelings of them. I know, it must be this crappy Christmas cheer people are raving about that is finally getting to me.
I'll backtrack. Two kids came over to play with my kids. The didn't know how to play checkers or what a yo-yo was. Is this weird? No. Not really. I just learned how to play checkers the other day, at 31 years old. And a yo-yo has never been able to hold my attention or patience for very long.
My son, on the other hand, completely devours activities that require intense thought and concentration. It's the only time he sits still and I can see his little brain working and it mesmerizes me. He's a brilliant little boy and I'll do everything in my power to foster this and help it grow and make it something he feels confident about.
So these kids come over and upon learning that they don't know what a yo-yo is or how to play checkers, he proceeds to teach them. Without missing a beat, he teaches the girl how to play checkers and shows the boy how to use the yo-yo. Upon hearing that the boy received an iPad for Christmas, my son simply said that was cool and showed him the mega Lego set he got. Then my son showed them all the puzzles they got. Then they went and played with something else.
He didn't falter. He didn't judge. He shared. He played. Life was simple and grand and full of toys and fun and the excitement that is childhood after Christmas.
Oh, the lessons we could learn from our youth.
The kinds of possessions they had didn't divide them. It didn't separate them. They did this miraculous thing called talking and sharing and playing and not a single judgement crossed their minds.
I'm not going to lie, some judgements crossed my mind.
Who gets their five year old an iPad? Those are expensive. They must have money. And for the same kid to not know what a yo-yo is? What kind of a childhood is that? Does all of his brain power depend on an electronic?
Luckily, I realized what a twat I was being and stopped myself. He probably got an iPad for the same reason my son got a Lego set: because it's something he would enjoy and play with and would help him learn. Also, for the record, my son got an XBox. A used, $80 XBox with used $5 games. But he doesn't know that. He doesn't care about that. He wanted one, and he got one, and he's happy and grateful to have one. He didn't expect it. He didn't demand it. And he holds it just as important as the checkers game or yo-yo.
How do I know it's not the same for his friend? I don't. I assumed. And I made an ass of myself. Even if it was for one split second and the thoughts were only in my head, it was an ass move. And I'm sorry.
I'm not sure if my son knows what an iPad is. I'm not sure he cares. I know that I don't want him to be dependent on electronics for entertainment. This is why we got him a checkers game, because I knew he'd love to play the game and it would be a great family bonding opportunity. That's why he got Legos and book and puzzles. And an XBox, because we're not total hippie dippie tools. Well, at least my husband isn't. I'm getting there...
And just because his friend got an iPad doesn't mean that his parents don't value those same things. It doesn't mean that this kid is going to be any better or worse than my children. It only means what I attach to it. The simplest aspect is that he got an iPad. Anything beyond that is speculation on my part. Clearly, from watching them all interact together, I'm the one that is in the wrong.
These kids taught me something today. They didn't sit me down and have a chat. They just did and I watched and I learned. That must be what it's like for them. They watch us and learn then apply it. It's kind of a terrifying thought.
It sounds like I need to do some more watching and some more learning. Maybe in my teaching, I need to pay more attention to what I do and say since they are hearing it and learning it. Maybe instead of focusing on the little annoyances that my son still needs to learn, I should focus on the fact that he's got some pretty important aspects of life figured out.
Maybe I've had my Grinch colored glasses on for the last few months and I need to put my rose colored glasses back on. After all, it is a new year in just a few short days, and there is nothing more exciting than the possibilities that a new year holds. All the adventures have yet to be had. That is something - at least one thing - to be happy about.
Happy New Year.
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