The Corner Office

It's been almost a year since I walked away from the corporate world and became a stay-at-home mom. While the change was mostly out of necessity (two kids in daycare was already tight and three would have been nearly impossible), I had a gut feeling that this transition needed to be done.

Now, I look back on my decision and the life I have and have zero regrets. This is what I was meant to do. No, I won't do it always as once the kids go to school I'll return to the work force. This looming expiration date only makes me enjoy my time that much more.

As I compare my two lives - that of the corporate world and that of the domestic universe - I see striking similarities. In many ways, my time in customer service and management prepared me for being a stay-at-home mom. I still wake up at 5am every morning. I shower, I do my hair and minimal make-up, and I put on jeans. No, I'm not donning jewelry or blazers and heels anymore, but I also don't allow myself to mope around in sweatpants either.  And while my "commute" is from the bedroom to the kitchen, I've gained an entire house in lieu of a cubicle. Here are other ways the corporate world as helped me in my domestic life.

Motivate
How do you get a 4 year old to clean up the living room? How about getting a 2 year old to use the potty? One of the most important things I was taught about management was that you have to learn what drives people. I've applied this logic to my children several times. Fortunately, it's easy to decipher what drives my children to do things - food. Specifically, chocolate and treats. If they finish their supper, they get dessert. If my daughter goes pee/poo in the potty, she gets a treat in the form of M&Ms. The key is that I make sure to hold these treats sacred and only give them out when something has been accomplished. They know they only get cookies for dessert and not for snack. Some may call it bribery, I call it rewarding. It's only bribery if you do it wrong.

Develop Talent
A company can't run efficiently if you have the wrong people doing the wrong jobs. Same goes for a household. For example, my son loves puzzles. He can sit for hours at the table in complete quiet doing puzzles. Naturally, I buy him puzzles and try get him ones I know will be a challenge. My daughter, on the other hand, is more of a mover and a shaker. She needs noise. For her, we get things that light up and make sound. If my son has a meltdown, we put on a movie and let him zone out. If my daughter throws a fit, we put on some music and she dances the tears away. I don't know yet where they will excel in academics or extra activities or sports, but whatever it is, I will be there to support them and challenge them to become the best they can - or want - to be.

Innovate
Ever have one of those nights where you go to make supper and all you find in the cupboards are cobwebs? Yeah, that happens on occasion around here. Enter Innovation. I can always find something to make for supper. Whether it's edible and will be eaten is up for debate, but I will always have food ready. Being innovative is a necessity for a stay-at-home parent with three small children under the age of 5. If I'm out of a key ingredient, I'm not going to pack up all the kids in the car and run to the store. I need to improvise. Luckily, I've created some of our favorite family meals this way.

Process Improvement
Things need to run smoothly in my house. I don't have time to spend 5 minutes looking for a sock when we're supposed to be heading out the door. I live by the motto "a place for everything and everything in it's place." My house is not clean or neat, but any standards, but it is organized (to a point) and works for us. For example, my youngest daughter has a ton of blankets that somehow always end up all over the house. I got tired of folding them every night, so they ended up being draped over the crib. Come bedtime, they would end up in a pile on the floor. That's not okay with me as I'm not really a "pile" kind of person. To improve this process, I took a plaque with hooks that had jewelry on it and moved it into my daughters room. Now all the blankets are hanging on the wall, not in a pile on the floor, and I don't have to fold them every day. Process improved.

Maintain/Improve Performance Standards
This is a tough one, both in the corporate world and the domestic universe. Setting clear standards and expectations are the first crucial step. In the corporate world, that's pretty simple. At home, it can get a little messy. What are appropriate expectations for a 4 year old, let alone my 4 year old? How do I know if I'm being unreasonable? If I want my son to establish a behavior as a habit, the first step is to give him something to model in myself. If I tell him not to use naughty words but them swear like a sailor, I can't reasonably punish him when the inevitable F bomb is dropped. The second part is to focus on the good and use that to improve the not-so-good. If he does an awesome job of cleaning up all the toys at the end of the day, I have to make sure to celebrate that and add how much easier it was when we didn't throw fits or complain about cleaning up. You can't have a meeting of the minds and only focus on the negative. The only result will be demoralization, which won't change any behaviors.

Have Fun
At the office, it was easy to get lost in the day-to-day activities. Emails, meetings, reports, more emails. There were days where I was so busy and flustered and overwhelmed that I was not a fun person. Unfortunately, those same pitfalls exist at home in the form of laundry, dishes and other household duties. It's easy for me to feel overwhelmed with three children to raise and a house to run. I'm not a spontaneous person, so I have to schedule in fun time. When my two youngest are sleeping, my son and I play games. I let them jump in the mud puddles. Go ahead and throw all the crayons around the living room. It can all be cleaned up later. We go to story time at the library and will spend an absurd amount of hours at parks this summer. We'll have picnics and go "camping" in the back yard. This time is limited, and they are only awake for 13 hours a day. I need to remember that the laundry can wait.

Know Your Business
At my previous job, we would have daily mini-meetings regarding the current state of the business we were in charge of. These terrified me, mainly because you couldn't BS your way through it. You had to know what you were talking about, anticipate questions and have solutions to problems. It was nerve-wracking for a perfectionist like me. Well, parenting isn't much different. When my son asks why the sky is blue, I can't just stare at him with a blank face. I either need to know the answer and be able to explain it to a 4 year old, or know how to find the answer so we can learn together. I have to know how much money we have for groceries and tailor my shopping list accordingly. I have to know when the children were last immunized and for what. I need to know how much they are eating and when they are eating and what their favorite foods are. I have to know my business, except now my business is the health, safety and happiness of my family. Makes those mini-meetings that were once the black hole in my day look like a walk in the park.

For me, there are many more perks to staying at home than going into an office. Again, however, I also know this time is limited. It was suggested that I could start a daycare. Nope. Not for me. I'm looking forward to the day I can dip my toe back into the working world simply because it will be yet another new and exciting chapter to my life. I'll never regret my decision to stay home and I'll never take for granted that I was able to raise my children for such a short time. Out of all the jobs I've had (and I've had quite a few), this has taught me the most.

For now, I'll sit and sip my coffee as I look out my corner office and take a deep sigh of gratitude.